Zombie Jesus/ TWO IN ONE DAY?

Easter is today.
Today is Easter.

My parent greeted me with a basket full of chocolate and gummy goodies.
Then, hidden beneath the green plastic cellophane, was a glorious 120 gigabyte silver iPod.
I haven't given her a proper name yet :(
Needless to say, nothing could ruin my day, even my aunt trying to hook me up with my coustin.
She kept pulling me over pointing at my cousin saying "...you see that sexy thang over there? ehh? You see her? She's sexy right? You see how sexy she is? Oh, what, don't you like girls?" then to my dad "He don't like girls? You like girls when you was his age right?"
I stood silently and blinked the entire time this was happening.
This is why, should I ever become romantically involved, I will not notify my mother's side of the family unless it is completely necessary.

My uncle referred to The Rocky Horror Picture Show as "The Rocky Mountains Horror". It was an honest mistake, but I laughed anyway.

Whenever my mom introduces me she states my grade. "Hi, this is my son Ciaran, he gets Straight A's"
Dad and I have asked her not to do it repeatedly, she doesn't care.
Sometimes she even pulls up my digital report card on her phone.

Two of my older cousins were talking about gun control laws, then for merely bringing up the idea that the reason places like Universities are targeted by gunmen is because nobody else is able to defend themselves (and in fact legally prohibited from doing so) and that gun control laws night not work very well, I was immediately hailed as a "poster child for the NRA".
Of course nobody bothered to ask my anything about it, or discuss the matter any further.
So they never learned that I'm an anti-gun pacifist, completely against the use of guns. But, I am also an anti-gun-control pacifist because I recognize our Constitutional right to bear arms, and I realize that people need to be able to defend themselves from armed gun men, and that when you ban your average citizen from bearing arms, then guns are exclusively in the hands of criminals that will put them to bad use, and nobody will be able to defend themselves and will instead have to rely on police forces that are almost nationally crappy.
Prohibition of any-kind fails, always.
/gun control rant.

I'm on volume two of Death Note

Best thing ever?
http://iloveegg.com/egg_english.htm
Very appropriate for Easter (only kinda sorta)